Masturbation and Selfhood

I’ve said a gazillion times how important it is to be centered and know yourself and your boundaries intimately, as a stripper, but also as any kind of sex worker or woman or person. The best way to be in touch with yourself is, literally, to touch yourself. Touch your whole body every morning, from toes to head. Go slow, and feel it all.

The best way to be in touch with yourself sexually is to touch yourself sexually. The better you know yourself, the better you’ll know what feels good and what doesn’t. When you’re fully grounded in your experience of pleasure you’ll be more able to create and direct more pleasure in your life, relationships, and work.

Did you know that thirty-three to fifty percent of women experience orgasm infrequently and are dissatisfied with how often they reach orgasm? It’s on medline plus, check it out. Only thirty five percent of women can orgasm from vaginal sex without clitoral stimulation.

It’s crazy, we are the sex symbols, but this culture also de-sexualizes us.

We all need to masturbate. Some women give up before they become proficient in having righteous orgasms. Some women just can’t get there with their hands, or are lazy. And I hope all of us are interested in broadening our sexual experiences. We all need sex toys! I have talked a lot on this blog about sexuality, without talking much about sex. But sex is part of this great life that I have and blog about, and I’ll probably be writing about it more soon. For now, I’m going to write about vibrators.

I’ve found this great company. They are sex positive, women positive, and review based. They’ve got all kinds of sexual articles, but the best part is the reviews. When you click on a toy, you can read real reviews by other real people who’ve bought that toy.

Plus, there’s a real person there, and she will answer your emails. I know because she answers mine. They’re gonna send me vibrators, and I’m going to review them for you guys. In the meantime, check out the website:

Sex Toys and Vibrator Reviews at VibeReview
Sex Toys @ VibeReview!


  1. I have to check out that website some time. My older sis works at a sex shop outside of Toronto and I was thinking “what an interesting job that would be”. Cool!

  2. Well, if you want to get technical, I’m not a symbol either. But folks in this culture sometimes choose to interact with me (and my boobs) as if they were symbols and/or objects. This seems to me like a weird choice, since it’s a lot more fun to interact with boobs as actually, you know, boobs, but whatever.

    I interviewed at a toy shop once and they asked me the most interesting interview question ever. I still haven’t come up with a very good answer. The question was, “If you were going to create the sex toy of your dreams, what would it be like?”

  3. I don’t believe stats about women’s orgasms. Not just because I orgasm several different ways including vaginally, ejaculate and have since childhood masterbation-
    not just because I have never been part of a questionaire designed to get numbers for these stats…not just because I’m a paranoid feminist, or cause I don’t trust the patriarchy that created easily manipulated “facts and figures”

    but, cause I have a feeling a lot of women have been conditioned to not discuss such things.

    have fun reviewing the toys!

  4. Well, if we’re discussing women’s orgasms, I’d like to pipe up for the 65% that survey indicates. In fact, I would be surprised if that number wasn’t higher, because women tend to feel dysfunctional in this regard. I am very much attuned to my sexuality, have been for many years. I know how I like it, and ain’t afraid to instruct others if we’re in it to win it together. This being said, I have never, ever, ever, had an orgasm through g-spot stimulation alone…nor with a penis alone. There’s a reason the clit has all the same nerve endings as a penis! That’s not to say that attention to that area doesn’t help once things are going, but it’s certainly not the main course.

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