You meet the quirkiest people when you’re willing to get naked for money.
Tonight I danced for an old fashioned senior citizen who declined to see my pudenda because that was “for the bedroom only.” Apparently, lap dances were okay outside the bedroom as long as I wore a g-string.
As I danced he gestured at my breasts and mentioned that he would love to lick them, and he’d like to lick my lower 48 too. I’m definitely going to call it that now. My lower 48.
Then, in an effort to get me in his bedroom for cash (not that he was calling me a prostitute, he assured me, he just wanted to know how much cash it would take to make love to me), he promised me that there was no way he’d last more than three minutes. 😆
(Smooth transition, eh?)
It has become time to get the fuck outta here. I haven’t quite made my driving through Canada cash yet, but I’ll make it somewhere else on the way outta here.