Boobie power

It’s like total systems failure here. The cell phone towers were down. The laptop blew up. I woke up with a flat tire and frozen lug nuts, and then the battery died too. Now I’m about get kicked out of this internet cafe that’s closing – so enjoy this thing I wrote a while ago and don’t have time to proofread until I get more internet access.

Sometimes women come into strip clubs and get drunk and obnoxious. At my current club, this is allowed as long as they are escorted by a man. If they don’t have a man with them they can’t stay, no matter how well behaved and high tipping they are. This is the twisted logic that ensures that none of the customers are prostitutes.

The other night there was a very loud, very drunk woman in the club. She was accosting customers with her breasts, trying to get naked, and otherwise just being annoying. I did see her get a few dances, tho, so I guess it all evens out.

I was sitting watching Passion, the girl before me, finish up on stage. Her song had ended and she was rushing to pick up all her tips while the DJ talked over the dead air space before my song. He refuses to start the next girls song until the first girl is off stage. Passion scurried to the end of the stage and picked up the dollars there, including one in front of the Very Obnoxious Girl.

“Hey,” VOG yelled, “I wanna see your pussy. Come back here.”

Passion scooped up the rest of her tips from the back of the stage and came down the stairs.

“Show me your pussy! I gave you a fucking dollar I wanna see your fucking pussy!”

I stepped on to the stage and glanced around at the twenty or so guys sitting there, dollars in hand, staring at… the VOG.

She looked around at the customers staring at her. “Hey. Wanna see my boobs?!” She started pulling her shirt up.

I evaluated the situation quickly. Customers. Money. Distracting obnoxious girl fucking with my money.

I walked to the end of the stage and pulled my dress down. She opened her mouth to yell again and I grabbed her passionately by the hair and jiggled my boobs in her face. I gave her a long, lustful look, heavy breathing and all, and then I patted the tip rail. “Where’s your dollars?”

She was speechless. “Um, I gave it to that other girl.”

“Oh.” I pouted like a spoiled rotten heiress, “then go away.”

She turned and walked up to the bar, where she sat sipping her drink quietly for the rest of my stage set.

When I got off stage the bouncer followed me back to the dressing room. “Man, what’d you say to that obnoxious girl? She sure shut the fuck up and sat down for you. I thought I was gonna hafta kick her out.”

“Just boobie power,” I told him.


  1. OK … that’s it, Tara … I’m going to tell this story to every damn person at my school Christmas party tonight … BUT I’LL SAY I WAS THERE! I’m such a liar . . . boobie power indeed. I’m a leg man and I admit, boobs can still make me go to jelly sometimes. Great stuff…

  2. I love going to strip clubs and I think that rule is unfair. Unlike that loud woman I just love the way women’s bodies are shaped. They are all different and a piece of artwork to me. Boobie power indeed. I’m going to have to try that at a holiday party sometime! Rock on!

  3. You’re fucking so dang Awesome!!!

    When I went to the Gary, IN strip club with my g.f. they weren’t going to let us in because we didn’t have a “man” with us. One of the strippers was standing in the doorway while I tried to tactfully argue our way in as paying and respectful customers. They weren’t having none of it until a couple walked in and we got the fella to say we were with him. It worked and we each dropped $80 on dances and drinks.
    It was an amazing time, the strippers loved us and joked and played with us. One took my lady over her knee and spanked her, another crawled from the stage into my lap. I couldn’t get over their scents (let alone the pole work). How did they turn the usually musky and feral between-legs-scent into cotton candy and fruit baskets and still make me want it?

  4. 😆
    Hell, yeah! I worked as a club dj in Sacramento for 11 years, and that’s one of the best responses I’ve ever heard of to that problem!

    Our club used to allow single women in, but they had to sit at the bar where the bartender could keep an eye on them…there was one woman who would come in about once a month-she was, well, not real attractive-late 30’s, 40 pounds overweight, and not especially well kept…she’d sit at the bar, order a beer or two, and within a half hour, get picked up by some horny drunk, and leave with them. After the 2nd or 3rd time this happened, we started to ask a few questions (as luck would have it, she hooked up with one of our more talkative regulars early on)…we thought she might be a part-timer, but it turned out that she was just horny, so the one weekend a month that her 12 year old son spent with her ex, she’d come in to the one place where she’d had good luck…never asked anybody for money (believe me, we asked)-although she did usually get the guy to pay for breakfast the next mornin;in fact, she even insisted on buying at least one round for any guy that bought her one, and always left the bartender with a good tip…

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